20 Questions to Answer before 2025 ends

My sister–colleague at work sent me this list, and I’m using it as a way to close out 2025.

Question 1. If you could use only three words to describe 2025, which three would you choose?

Reborn, Betrayal, Confident.

Reborn: I finally got custody of my son. We are both free.
Betrayal: I was betrayed by the legal system of this country, and by a manager I trusted.
Confident: I am gaining my confidence back — sharper, more concise, yet trying to blend it with empathy and calmness.

Question 2. Standing at the end of the year and looking back, does this year feel complete… or is there still a little regret somewhere?

I think it feels complete. It’s not regret, but I wish I had seen other people’s true colors earlier, so I wouldn’t have placed my trust in the wrong places. Then I could have protected my soul and my son better.
However, I acknowledge that “the only way to learn is to live.”

Question 3. This year, did you try doing something you had never dared to do before?

How did it feel at that moment?

I overcame my fear of heights one time by taking a chairlift to the top of a mountain at night in Abisko, Sweden, for an Aurora chase. It was booked by accident, so I am still afraid now 🤣
I also overcame my fear of sharing my feelings and speaking up to people who always used their power to pressure me. Proud of myself.

Question 4. Have you been to any new places this year — a space, a city, or a country you had never visited before?

Many places this year: Abisko, Istanbul, and Prague.

Prague became the best trip I’ve made — with colleagues who also feel like friends, a little family in our company. I’m glad I chose this trip instead of traveling solo to the Baltics. Now the four of us are bonded, and soon one of us will leave the company for a new career path, which I’m truly happy for. At least we made this trip together.

Question 5. On that journey, which scene or view has stayed in your memory the most?

The memories with our little family — the co-workers I met at IKEA. We got to know each other better and grew closer: spending weekends together, going to markets, shopping, cooking in a homestay, and laughing until we cried in a restaurant.

Question 6. Did you make any new friends this year?

And how did the two of you become friends?

Ianne from Brazil — through IKEA Social Entrepreneurship and the IKEA Next Generation Program.

She is sweet, straightforward, and a great communicator. I need to save this conversation because it’s interesting: I was planning to write about her quietly in my journal, and then she randomly texted me. It felt like a coincidence we think of each other, but I also learned something from her — it’s good to tell people how much they, and the relationship you share, mean to you.

I asked ChatGPT to decorate our conversation screenshot for memory.

Question 7. Choose one song you listened to a lot this year (one is enough, more is fine too)

I spent almost 4–5 hours per day during work to listen to this song:

Question 8. A moment in 2025 that made you feel truly happy.

April 21st — after the court decision on my son’s custody.

Question 9. Did you shed tears over anything this year?

So many — I can’t even list them anymore. This might be the hardest year I’ve ever gone through in terms of love, life, family, friends, and work.
However, it’s also the best year because I’ve learned so much and discovered who the best people are — and who to stay away from.

There was sadness, but also joy. I don’t regret a single tear, because I can cry again — unlike previous years when I was numb and emotionally frozen.

Note: When I wrote this, the sister who sent me these questions later shared that she cried alone in bed last night because of family issues, which reminded her of this question. My heart broke hearing that. I know it’s very tough, but sometimes all you can do is listen.

Question 10. Were there moments when things felt so hard that you could hardly breathe?

Have you stepped out of that moment now?

Yes.

When I was in court.

When my son and I packed up and ran away.

When his father took him back for a few months before the final trial.

When my son cried at night and begged to stay with me instead of his father.

When his father threatened me — violently, sexually and emotionally.

But it’s all over now.

Question 11. If you could go back, what would you like to say to yourself at that time?

“Choose yourself and your son over anyone or anything. Your feelings and emotions matter. Even if you want to be a good person, at least be good to yourself.”

Question 12. The people who were by your side last year — are they still with you this year?

Yes, definitely. They have been with me for many years, and this year, when bad things happened, they showed up even more. I’m grateful they are still around, and I hope I can do the same for them.

Question 13. A moment this year that made you feel warm inside.

When my son says the sweetest things to me — things I don’t even know where he learned. He’s so caring.

He often says, “Mommy, happy,” when he doesn’t see me smiling — he expects me to smile and show my teeth. When I randomly ask him, “Are you happy?” he always says yes. When I ask why, he answers, “Because mommy is with me.”

I never taught him these things. I don’t know where he learned them. He is the sweetest boy, and I hope I can support him in keeping this kindness as he grows into adulthood.

Question 14. This year, did you come to love something more?

It could be a person, a habit, or a new version of yourself.

I love my new version — warmer and calmer, but still energetic and enthusiastic about life.

Question 15. Is there anything you regret?

If you could do it again, would you choose differently?

I could have been more honest about my feelings and emotions. Sometimes I don’t like certain people, but I tell myself I should still show gratitude. However, I shouldn’t ignore my feelings at the end. It’s good for me — and maybe also good for them to show my authentic feelings toward them instead of showing gratitude only.

Question 16. Is there anything that made you realize you are different this year compared to last year?

Completely different. My life changed every single day after I decided to divorce. I am much stronger. My emotions are becoming more independent (not 100% yet), but I no longer absorb other people’s emotions the way I used to.

Question 17. This year, did you learn a new skill or discover a new hobby?

Yes — Chinese traditional dance.
And I returned to an old hobby: art and crafts using different materials.

Question 18. After a year has passed, have you gained a new perspective, a deeper understanding, or a personal life lesson?

Social media doesn’t bring happiness. If you can control yourself and not be affected by others’ posts, you’re fine. For me, I’m still easily affected by negative posts or news, so it’s better for me to stay away — even if that means being a bit “dumb and silly.”

The world is still full of good people, but you must look at behavior and actions, not just words. There are liars and manipulators around us — in life and at work — and we must not be manipulated by them.

Question 19. This year, was there a book, movie, or TV series that you especially loved?

TV Series:

I completed the latest season of New Amsterdam. The series always reminds me of kindness, empathy, and the trauma people carry throughout their lives. It also gives me a sense of how suddenly death can come, the grief of possibly losing the people you love, and what truly matters most in life.

Movie:

One movie I plan to watch is As Far as My Feet Will Carry Me (2001), a German film about World War II prisoner Clemens Forell escaping from a Siberian Gulag and walked back to Germany.

Books:

Non-fiction: Daring Greatly by Brené Brown — a transformative book that challenges the cultural myth that vulnerability is weakness.
Fiction: The Midnight Library — a story about the in-between moments of life and death.

Question 20. If you could leave one sentence for yourself at this time last year, what would you say?

“It was a big year for you and your son. This year went dramatically down to prepare for a future rise — a transformation. You are both still alive, joyful, and happy. That matters most.”

It was a tough year, but it was also a year that gave me a chance to live my life again.

Thank you to everyone who has been by my side, and I wish everyone enough strength to continue their journey through life.